Sign at the hospital canteen
Sign at the hospital canteen

So my wonderful wife Kate Ellen tried to take on a van on Tuesday morning.

You know how I said my life is really odd. Well, a lot of things tend to go really wrong sometimes too. So while she has this eye-patch on she gets hit by a van.

She was fucking lucky.

It was the first thing the doctor said to me. She was lucky.

My day sort of went like this: I hadn’t slept well, and I didn’t have work until half one in the afternoon. Kate Ellen left at seven am – I don’t even remember her leaving, I slept through that as I often do when she leaves that early. The combined attention seeking from the cats and the chickens was hard to stay asleep through so I put my headphones.

And slept through sixteen missed calls and a police man knocking on my door.

I work up to find said policeman in my bedroom.

That didn’t freak me out too much (everyone is telling me that waking up with a strange guy in the room would freak them out). What freaked me out was that my wife had been in an accident. I think that supersedes pretty much anything else. He drove me to the hospital (after I put clothes on) and told me what happened.

Kate Ellen ran off her bus and ran across the road to catch her next bus. She came out of no where and the van driver didn’t even see her coming. With that eye patch on, she probably didn’t see him coming either. He was going around 30 mph, and it happen outside the ambulance station in Aberystwyth. She was lucky.

We were lucky.

Notice board at the Cat Scan Unit.
Notice board at the Cat Scan Unit.

She doesn’t really remember what happened. In fact she doesn’t remember most of Tuesday. They took her up to Intensive Care and they really looked after her up there. She’s on a ward now – and right this second – fast asleep.

I have never been so scared in my life. If I had lost her…this could’ve been so much worse. I live a very specific life that mostly revolves around my wife. She’s keeping me going. We keep each other going. To lose that…I don’t even want to think about it.

The cats are going batshit insane.

The first night was the worst, they went bonkers running around the place. They didn’t settle when I did, running in and out of the bedroom. They calmed down a little after that first night, Mr. Brown decided what he wanted to do was sleep on the envelope of her things that the hospital gave me after the accident. This is how he is showing me he misses her. They sleep with me at night instead of in the living room. Last Mr. Brown got into bed with me, Pogo slept next to me.

I’ve hardly seen Merry. I see her at breakfast and dinner, but she stays on the wardrobe watching and waiting for her to come home.

It’s hard to explain that it’ll be another week at the very least.

I’ve spent most of every day sitting in hospital watching her sleep and breathe using the hospital wi-fi that one really works in certain places, especially next to windows. I brought her own laptop in too, so she can watch films and so on while she’s awake. They’re being pretty good to me. Plus there is free tea.

Leaving though is awful.

It’s pretty much the most distressing thing I’m going to do in my life – leave my wife in the hospital and go home. I felt awful yesterday though cleaning the house up a bit helped. I’d been alone three days and it had all gone a bit nuts so I got on top of some of it last night.

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